Sickie Ickie's Faux Firewood
When directing a stage show earlier this year, I needed a faux log for one of the actors to beat someone with that wouldn't leave the "victim" unconscious for the rest of the night. Although actors may be a dime a dozen, lawsuits are worth a lot more!
So...I came up with this simple method for a lightweight log prop that is easy to make and won't cause serious injury with proper use.
Supplies
Extruded Styrofoam
3M 77 Spray Adhesive (or other adhesive)
Knife
Dremmel (or Drill) w/Drill Bit
Handsaw (or Hacksaw)
99 cent Black Spray Paint
Brown Latex Paint
Beige Latex Paint
Let's Begin!
How big do you want your log? If it's for a haunt fireplace with a false fire, then size of your (pink) log isn't too important. (Sounds almost dirty doesn't it? Keep your mind out of the gutter and in the graveyard where it belongs!)
If you want a log for a person to hold onto in a scary manner, then you have to make it so it is comfortable enough for one hand that the fingers are not struggling to hold it. This is different for everyone. Some have huge basketball player hands, and others- like me- have little dwarf type hands. Obviously the bigger the hand, the larger circumference it can hold.
You'll find that the pink extruded Styrofoam actually has a layer of plastic on the surface of both sides. Lift up an edge of that plastic and you can peel it right off. You'll need to do that to both sides or the adhesive will not stick the way it should later on. You want NAKED Styrofoam! Yippee!!!
Start by roughly cutting the desired size diameter width. (Later you can cut to length if desired.) There's actually a method I found that works best for me to do this. Take your knife and score your line...
then place the score over the edge of a raised flat surface. Firmly (gently!) press down on the shorter piece that overhangs. If you start near the end of the Styrofoam you'll hear a "CRACK!" That's what you want. Gently (firmly!) work that crack down to the other end. It should break off along your score! If you have your piece still hanging on after breaking, give a quick snap up and the piece will come right off.
Now you have your template. Just place the template on the Styrofoam, line it up with the edge, and use the knife to score right along by it. Snap off that piece and repeat as many times as you want your width. It doesn't have to be perfect, just roughly what you want!
See? The forms aren't perfect. Your log doesn't have to be straight. It can zag or zig or be wavy or whatever!
Laminate the Styrofoam by using the adhesive spray between layers and building the "sandwich." Place a heavy object(s) on top while it dries. Follow the instructions of your adhesive for drying and ventilation.
Now, take your saw (or knife. or hot wire, or ?) and cut down the corners along the side so they are more rounded.
Now keep carving and slicing strips until your log is roundish in shape. There's at least three ways to do this, and I usually end up doing a combination of all three. The first is shown in the photo. Stand it up and cut down it (like gyro meat on a spit). The second is to place it on its side and carve horizontally. The third is to carve it any way you want to. Don't be shy! It's fun! ...and Messy!
Take the knife and place it 90 deg to your surface. Now with comfortable pressure- run the knife all the way down the length. Notice I'm NOT cutting it by sawing.
After a few times the surface will become what I call "furred." (roughed up.) Do this in and out of the crannies you decided to make and all the way around the piece. Fair warning- You'll have pink snow everywhere!
When you are done, rub your hand back and forth over your pink log. Hey! Graveyard thoughts, remember? That will knock any loose fur off your log.
Take the Dremmel with a drill bit (or Drill, or soldering iron, or ?), and make wavy lines along the length of the Styrofoam. Make sure you go all the way around it. Then run your hand along it again to knock off any debris.
HOLY HARDWOOD!!! THE END IS UNEVEN! What do we do??? Serial Killer Jason! Where's your knife!?!
Relax, my friends. The edge is always saved for last. True firewood is usually sawn off, so we'll do the same thing to add realism. Take your handsaw and saw off both ends. It makes the edge flat and gives the end real saw marks. The sawing is very fast and very easy because you're just slicing through foam...Oh, the rusty saw blade is optional.
If you want burnt logs
...in your fireplace, paint with a latex black gloss and you are done, except for the occasional dab of orange and white...maybe a little orange/gold glitter sparingly for embers...
If you want more natural logs
... spray with flat latex black (Pay attention to those lines!), then paint with a brown latex paint. The black will make the lines stand out next to the brown bark and keep the bark from looking too perfect on the exterior. Paint the ends with a beige latex paint, and add rings with a pencil or permanent marker, or paint, or blood... If desired, optional moss or dirt can be stippled on with a sponge, or glued on.
Be careful with the type of paint you choose to spray or paint on!
Don't lose your masterpiece!
Some paint contains Acetone...
Acetone eats foam!
Get latex paint!!!
...unless of course you are trying for the above look...
TIP
- During heavy use of stage beatings night after night, a few logs broke. The solution was putting a dowel down the length of the log through the center.
- The latex paint adds much durability and actually keeps the log from denting as easily.
- The latex paint also acts as a glue to hold the layers together!
- Krylon makes a water based spray latex paint called H2O Latex. Click here to go to the Krylon website.
Be careful with actual heat next to Styrofoam! It can melt and cause fires!
Although I haven't done it yet, I have thoughts of creating a hollow faux firewood log and adding flickering led lights inside. That way the flickering lights are self contained inside the logs and can be moved anywhere without trying to hide the mechanisms/extension cords!